Dark Phases

Straying. Falling. Silent. Stillness. Wilderness. Darkness. Alone. Cold. Tears. Broken.

Ever felt any of these words? I have...plenty of times in all areas of my life. We have all felt them. We have all felt God being far away...no - us being far away...to the point where we feel like we're straying..falling..and it's silent..it's all still..could it be the wilderness? I dunno..it's dark..and i feel alone...is it getting cold in here? No, I feel cold. Wait, my cheeks feel hot..what, tears? why? Oh, I'm broken...now I see that's why.

God..I know You're here, but why do I miss You so? Why can I not hear You anymore? My dreams turned dark: black magical world. Scrawny black hands with sharp nails grabbing my shoulders. A murderer set out to kill me.

What happened to the peacful dreams? The ones where I kiss Your scarred wrists? The ones where I lay my head on Your lap as You carress my head with Your fingertips which give me dreams of heaven.

There are times in our lives where we might feel this way. Where we might get discouraged in our walk...where we will miss Him in our relationship with Jesus and we're trying our best to seek Him out because we miss Him so much, but have you ever thought that during those times it's when He is smiling at you because you are seeking Him? Dark dreams may be ways of saying, "Satan wants you more than you may ever know. Why? Because you're in way too deep with God."

Talk to God and seek Him with a passion. Reach to new levels and be bold..never give in to depressing thoughts - thoughts of how unworthy you are because you know what? You're worthy. You have great value in the eyes of God and His eyes are enflamed with intense fire...He sees things we cannot see and if He says that we have value in His eyes...you better believe it.